Doing, doing, doing…not being, being, being.

You may be on what has been labelled the “healing journey” - going within and learning about yourself, reading many books, absorbing all the podcasts and going to workshops, ceremonies and doing the work…

This was (and to a certain extent still is) me…and doing all this I’d still feel stuck. And as much as I thought I was doing the right things…it was just that - the endless cycle of doing.

It was just another trip to the one I was on before. There was not the being.

I would intellectualise everything, and got better at articulating these things I was learning…which was another trap, it felt good to be able to able to share my new learnings with wise words, coming across like some teacher.

Another trap…

There was constant work on myself, I kept finding things to fix - further reinforcing that I’m broken and need healing. Ultimately this signifies a lack of acceptance.

All this healing becomes addictive, it can seem never ending, especially as it now seems “on-trend” - and fixation on this, ultimately is resistance to actually living and being in the game…

There is always more knowledge to accumulate, but then again there is plenty to integrate and apply. There are so many fixes on offer out there - another plant ceremony, another book or course…and it’s to identify with the process as a destination - but it’s the inner alignment which is the gold and nothing out there can do that.


And it’s the inner alignment that brings the freedom to be present with exactly who you are now, and ultimately create from who you are now - not waiting for perfection to knock on your door and tell you that you can finally live.

I think slowing down, from time to time even taking a break from external input, to allow yourself really tune in and feel yourself, to notice patterns with love and compassion and curiosity.

And allow yourself to experiment with integrating what you already know and have learnt…lean into these topics by actually being open to the experience.

To being willing to try new things and new habits and ways of being…in the name of play and experimentation. Not perfection, which is often the barrier to actually being the ideas you wish to be.

Knowing each small action is worth more than reading another 5 books.

And any perceived failure is simply an experience to then refine and reiterate for the next time.

More playfully and with more wisdom….because there is no audience and nobody to perform for.

It’s always You vs. You.

This moment is always the doorway to freedom.

When beginning to see myself with more clarity & honesty…there was lots of suffering of the feelings that came up seeing the role I had in it all.

All the behaviours and negative patterns that were a destructive force in my life.

I’d push them away trying to escape them, this resistance creates more suffering.

I was still identifying with these things from my mind - my story, my ego, personality - why me, victim mentality - but very attached to the narratives and stories of “me.” 

And it was when these attempts became hopeless, really I didn’t have the energy to keep fighting it, that surrender was possible.

Actually allowing myself to feel what was actually going, the physical expression and energy of it…I notice that some of that on going narrative and mental commentary began to lessen, and there was a newer awareness.

There was a sense of presence with what is. I didn’t like it still, but I began to notice, that I could be with it for a bit longer.

And with less identification with stories, the hold of the past that was plaguing me slowly began to dissolve too.

Joe Dispenza says an ‘Emotion is Energy in Motion’ - E-motion. Makes sense.

So this energy is seeking release, we tend to hold on to them because the story associated with them has some particular meaning for us.

So perhaps our freedom really is found in surrendering into the fullness of each moment.

Allowing things to unfold, feeling what arises, not grasping or pushing away anything…we may notice it’s what’s beneath that is more true - this depth and stillness always available to us - the truth of You.

“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind.” Romans 12:2

In the instance
one is born,
perhaps even from
the moment of
seed germination,

to the pattern of this world,

one’s mind is being 

intricately woven.

So begins our prognosis,

see at the very beginning

the brain is in this theta state

Literally akin to hypnosis.

Neural connections begin forming,

shaped by parental vibes 

and cultural tribes.
The network is now moulding.

social behaviours and 

environmental stress

hard-wiring the pathways 

like the most technical plays

in a game of chess.

Exposed to continuous stimulation,

on the mind there’s constant impression,
this is the gradual formation

of one’s limited perception…

…so who knows what’s wrong
Who knows what’s right,

on goes the subconscious habituation,

the grooves embed so deep,

this  hard-wiring becomes so tight.

At the mercy of governing entities

mass media and

sticky app technology,

not really aware

that this is the slick creativity
behind the mass conformity

of what was once

your sovereign psyche. 

So perhaps now this is opposition
controlled perception,

and for knowing the essence 

of one’s true nature,

the most water-tight

Protection.

Trapped in a cage

in one’s own mental maze,

no wonder we walk around

under a clouded haze,

head in a daze,

eyes glazed with 

not much to say.

Look around,
you know the world is crying out

for renewal,

so to are we,

For a complete re-wiring of
the worldly individual.

Now I say,

it’s fasting from the world,

the sharp sword 

of meditation that cuts through

the illusion that is

the mind’s default delusion,

eventually enabling one

to dwell in the space

between thoughts,
And herein the power lies…
But to break old patterns
first we must
slow down…
and recognise.

Meditation turns on
the cool light of contemplation
And this inner-world exploration

prepares one for a more measured

outer-world application.

Contemplation leads to

one to question…

What has been impressed

upon me by

this world I see and know,

and what is genuinely 

my own?

Are the thoughts
I engage in 

one’s I am sourcing & selecting,

or simply the result of
a life-long conditioning?

…which leads to the cultivation

of this freedom of choice:

And my friend,
You do have a choice:

mindless repetition or….

soulful evolution.

But my love,

go easy during this
inner investigation,

on yourself be gentle

and non-judgmental

but do know that 

committed meditation

and objective contemplation

hold the potential for

your transformation,

…they are the proven
premium tools…

for mental-renewal.

Now, I’m certainly not saying 

simply buy my words or follow me,

but my friend, I do say

it’s only when

the mind is empty,

in a state of stillness and clarity,

does one finally see the plight of

The individual’s
And then the world’s collective conformity…

…only then and only then 

will you see

That living in the Heart is

the only place

where you’re truly free.

HEIGHTENED VIBRATION

Do you feel

our worldly vibration…
…it’s heavy, the density
like we’re weighed down
& chained to the solidity

of emotion & materiality.

Anchored by a

low vibration
on this his earth plane,

has become

the common habitation.

Ironically. it’s from this
Space that we’ve become
So obsessed with
Material manifestation.
for to bring forth and make visible
That which does not exist
Is the e-pit-o-me of creation

And so
Perhaps it’s limited

to only use one’s

effort and energy

for material manifestation,

when it’s possible
to use the power

of concentration

to raise one’s
personal Vibration.

My dear,

I say the soul
yearns elevation,
to rise above the worldly limitation,

For it is pure radiance,
buried but sparked by
sustained contemplation in meditation.

So perhaps focusing on

the manifestation of

the quality of
your being,

is far more
fruitful and

nourishing. 

These elevated frequencies

will not only attract

the material things

that resonate,

but more impactful

is the presence of

your very being now,
Because for all of us

It will illuminate. 

My friend,

you have power beyond measure,

yet so often you doubt

your your own experience,

you are literally

sitting on buried treasure.

You look out there

accumulating knowledge

scouring the books & resources,

all the while overlooking

that fact your lived experience

is where the wisest

force is.

The constant seeking and striving

externally for answers to help

you live a meaningful existence,

is to the growth and

cultivation of wisdom

perhaps the very resistance.

Cherish the direct evidence of your own unique life experience,

sit with it

reflect and contemplate,

and watch insight emerge

for you to begin

to applicate.

The information’s new and data rich,

it’s yearning to be put into practice

to test and iterate

and eventually into a new way of being,

Integrate.

What you learn may be harsh

as your darkness is brought to light,

don’t take it personally

this now is objective clarity,

And they say pain is the chisel

on the path

of self-discovery.

Know deeply,

You are your own guru

Nobody will ever be more expert on

your life than you.

So don’t waste the joy or
bypass the suffering

of your lived experience,

because it’s the most

direct evidence 

And most powerful demonstration
of the potential of your
personal transformation.

My friend, I swear our

nature is buoyancy

and high vibrancy…

Simply release this baggage

And attachment to a limited worldly identity

In order to effortlessly emit

this ever-present divinity.

My love,

allow your true essence

to shine,

Be transparency,

it really is that

of beauty, and

a bright light-hearted

love & spirituality