Meditation: Reclaiming your Authority
Amongst many things, meditation has shown me that I have more authority over myself than I thought I did.
My existence was alway dictated by emotion and the external environment - pushed and pulled by things outside of control, anger and frustration towards others because of their actions, pushing away things that felt uncomfortable, striving for and chasing things that were always out of reach.
In short, avoiding what was here right now.
It was akin to slavery, no inner authority - tho I would not articultate it in these ways, there was no ability to choose how I respond to my life - inner & outer.
As my meditation practice deepened, I began to recongise that I was creating this space between me and my moment-to-moment experience.
And it’s in that space that I see that I have a choice in what and how I engage in these things.
I began to notice that the thoughts, feelings and emotions are inviting awareness and curiosity, not just hooks to knee-jerk reactivity.
Here’s a few notes on what I’ve learnt on meditation & reclaiming authority over myself - they may be useful reflections for you:
1. Mastering the Mind
The mind is constantly pulled by distractions — social media, worries, expectations, regrets. Meditation trains to observe these thoughts without attachment - did I ask for this thought to arise? When reacting to every impulse lessens, already there is a litle more control over the mind. I have more power over the decision on where my attention goes; and perhaps more importantly, where it doesn’t.
2. Emotional Intelligence
Authority over yourself means mastery over your emotional state - to feel emotions and not be controlled by them is masculine, to react and be controlled by them is a more feminine trait. Meditation has taught me how to sit with discomfort — to feel anger, fear, and sadness without letting them dictate my actions. Stillness amongst the turbulance of emotions.
3. Strengthening Presence
In my experience, an unfocused mind is weak; a present mind is powerful. Meditation sharpens the attention and deepens presence. Instead of drifting through life, I noticed that I’m showing up fully — in conversations, decisions, and moments of difficulty. Engaging in all of it.
4. Re-writing Stories
I grew up with a many limiting beliefs - from my relationship to money to what I could achieve, to my worth in relationships. I carried this programming around all my life. Meditation has helped to dissolve these conditioned patterns. As you sit in silence, you being to shed these accumulated layers and begin revealing the authentic self beneath - which has been there all along.
5. Conviction in Speech & Behaviour
When the mind is calm and the heart is clear, words carry more weight. There is no longer seeking approval or fearing rejection - there is confidence to share what I want, when it feels right to and also to be silent when the moment demands.
If you’ve sat with yourself in meditation for 15-20 mins, you’ll know it is far from passive — it’s a process of taming the chaos of the inner world. And to to have command over it creates an unshakeable foundation.
No doubt, this inner world foundation is vital for building anything in the outer one.
Here for your transformation.
Let’s walk together.x
Arjun
Christ was a Neuroscientist
I don’t talk about Christ or God very much, but I am leaning into more expression of these topics that are in my heart, at the risk of losing IG followers or readers here.
And so be it.
For the past 15 years, I’ve gone deep into understanding my mind and brain and how to change it, because they were both crap and I was living like that.
Neuroscience, behaviour change, meditation etc. I devoured stuff from Joe Dispenza and Bruce Lipton, Rick Hanson, Judson Brewer and Jon Kabat-Zinn.
But more enjoyable and inspiring for me are the older folks who draw a lot of inspiration from the Bible's teachings on faith and belief - which align with these new scientifc understandings of the power of mind.
Folks like James Allen, Neville Goddard, Joesph Benner, Napoleon Hill, Charles Haanel and Florence Scovel Shinn - all these folks are free on YouTube if you want it.
And after it all it comes back to the Bible and Christ. Here’s one of my favourite verses (3 more at the bottom of this post).
“Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind.”
Romans 12:2
We babies come in to this world with a spongy blank canvas of a brain, and immediately it begins forming patterns based on external stimuli.
The world at large is shaping us from the moment we enter, it takes incredibly attentive parents to ensure the child is not so contaminated with their drama, and encouraged to go through their individual process of becoming…I’ve seen this up close, it’s beautiful to witness, but seems rare in our modern world.
From ages 0-7 an operating system is being formed, call it the brain’s default mode network, we carry it around for the rest of our lives.
This 5 minute video explains it beautifully - Bruce Lipton
The high-ranking (controversial) Jesuits in the 16th century would say: 'Give me the child until he is 7 and I will give you the man' - mind-blown (easy to go off on a tangent here regards to the sinister on-goings in sects of the Catholic church).
It’s only with active attention and intention, and the discomfort that comes with interrupting patterns and laying down new thoughts and behaviours, that we snap out of the autopilot mode that is this operating system, where we repeat the same patterns, getting stuck in the same cycles.
In the context of this Bible verse:
”Conform to the pattern of this world”:
This is the programming and conditiong that we all go through in the process of becoming worldly citizens - the masses.
“renewal”:
refers to neuroplasticity - the brain’s ability to adapt and rewire it’s structure & function in response to new experiences.
So in a nutshell, the verse is demonstrating that a renewal of the mind is the path of transformation.
And as we are transformed, as Christ said, we are in the world but not of the world.
I wrote (and performed) a piece of poetry on this, you can read it here if you're interested.
Poetry goes a long way in getting messages across that can sometimes get lost under technicalities and reams of theory - I feel this piece does just that.
Here’s to our transformation.
Let’s walk together.x
Arjun
3 more verses which link to neuroscience
"For as he thinks in his heart, so is he." - Proverbs 23:7
Research shows that neural pathways (repeated thoughts) shape sense of self & behaviour, behaviour shapes outcomes and the life we live.
"Be still, and know that I am God." - Psalm 46:10
Meditation and stillness are vital for brain health. Plenty of research shows that meditation and mindfulness reduce stress (cortisol) and enhance congitive function. Know yourself underneath the constant thought stream.
"Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires." - James 1:19-20
Pause and slow down. This is a means of interrupting emotional reactivity (brain part amygdala which is responsible for detecting threat) based on our previous conditioning. How often do we do or say things we regret in the heat of the moment? It’s a practice of re-training the brain and our perception.
The Ego Takes it Personally
I’ve long been very self-absorbed, it was my nature - all about me, me, me. Everyone and everything else after.
When reflecting on recent shifts, it’s evident that this attachment to myself - my personality, my feelings, my reputation, my needs, my self-worth - was a trap, and often perpetuated so much of my suffering.
And still does to a certain extent.
When holding onto this ‘sense of self’ so strongly, there is a need to defend them, anything anybody did I saw as a direct attack on me.
I can see that always taking things so personally kept me reactive, insecure and isolated from me everyone else. This is exactly what the ego thrives on - identity, the separation - this sense of significance, always needing validation and approval.
This ego aspect of us, when challenged or is criticised or ignored - feels it is being threatened and so needs to defend itself.
I know for me this led to overreacting, emotional reactivity - either lashing out or saying something regretful. And then holding onto resentment about the other person blaming them for making me feel this way.
Firstly, as a man - this is not cool, it’s the quickest way to lose respect. Secondly, it is reinforcing the illusion that we are all seperate - me vs everybody else.
This inner work - facing myself - is seeing that I am operating from my wounds, my childhood conditioning…my inner turmoil.
That I only see the world from this lens, through my personal experiences - I began to soften to the idea that we’re all doing the same.
We’re all carrying this heavy burden, this baggage of our past experiences, some are heavier than others…but so long as we’re carrying these heavy loads, we’re always looking for opportunities to unload them - normally on anybody one who has triggered some part of us that needs healing.
Take this approach towards yourself first, and then externally towards the other.
Observe > Instead of reacting
Question > Instead of assuming
Understand > Instead of blaming
Stepping out of this narrow ego hold, is to see that everybody is projecting themselves from what they are holding onto inside - knowingly or unknowingly.
It need not be a reflection on me - this is a liberating but dilligent practice. The ego is subtle and sneaky, it will flare up at the slightest opportunity.
I’m still very consumed with myself - it’s a work in progress. But actively working on not taking things so personally slowly dissolves the me vs. them mentality - guarded, defensive and on alert - narrow….
This brings down the walls of separation and in doing so connects me to others knowing we’re all walking the same path, all needing the lightness that comes with letting go, all needing the love to overcome our inner challenges.
We’re wired to detect threat and danger - but not everyone out there is an enemy.
Each is a fellow traveller on the journey…so the fight is not out there, it’s within.
Transformation (4 of 4)
Following on from the previous post - an interpretation of the cylce of change (Meditation > Contemplation > Integration > Transformation), this is a brief on the final of the 4 elements.
So here we are - transformation. In case you’ve not been following this mini-series they have been crystalised on my blog page.
As you take small steps & actions that align with who you want to become, there is evidence of this new person beginning to take root.
Ultimately, the brain needs this confirmation; the universe needs the concrete evidence, that you are who you say you are.
And you are what you do in any moment. Moment by moment. And this is why it is imperative to take these continuous steps, no matter how small, that are undeniable proof that you are this new version of yourself.
Feel into the energy of change that you are creating, the new dynamic - the dopamine release for doing the thing. Allow this to be the motivation to go again and again.
Remember - you are transforming, no matter how small it may seem, you are engaging in the process all the time - acknowledge the efforts and committment to the process.
Yes, the mind will come in and tell you’re not that, look around - the environment loks the same, your job or where you live etc.
And that’s okay - keep walking.
It’s important to not allow the external environment to put you off, this is about inner transformation - trust the external enviroment will mould around your new vibration gradually.
With each mini-transformation you complete - whether that’s the early morning routine, the exercise, less anger when driving, improved diet, finish a book - whatever, you are in renewal and are re-wiring the brain circuitry that has been running the show for so long.
Lean in towards expressing these new parts of yourself that are emerging and taking root - they require nurture in the form of reptition. Over and over again.
It’s not meant to be easy - otherwise everyone would do it. But it’s certainly possible.
”Transformation is not a destination; it is a journey of continuous growth & self-discovery” - Tony Robbins
I came aross this quote from the big man, and like most of his stuff - it resonates.
Transformation does not have to be some lofty far-away goal and actually when perceived in this way, often you’re defeated before even getting started.
And so seeing it as an ongoing journey of continuous growth and self-discovery, not only allows you to deeply engage in the process but also relinquishes that attacment to the results, the end goal….
But what is the end goal, if not a life lived well - which can only ever be achieved now.
Take a huge step towards your transformation by setting up a free call here - happy to answer any questions you might have and share anything that has supported me in my process.
Let’s walk together.x
Arjun